Sex between a Muslim and a Non-Muslim is not at all forbidden in the Islamic religion. It is only a problem when one or both of the partners are from a Muslim country and when they are married to someone who is not a Muslim. In the eyes of Islam, two Muslim men and a non-Muslim woman cannot have sexual intercourse unless they are married to each other. Even then there is nothing to be worried about as long as the marriage is only committed within the rules of the Islamic law. One may not even enjoy sex with his or her own Muslim spouse but rather must remain in the house doing the will of God and the prayers.
The ruling is same for Muslim married women. They cannot engage in sexual activity outside the confines of their home. Even though Islam allows sex outside of marriage, it is not something that is condoned or encouraged. Therefore, Muslim sex is considered to be ‘odious’ or an abomination by Islam, and is therefore discouraged by Muslim women wishing to marry men outside their faith.
In addition, a Muslim man has the obligation to provide for his wife financially, as well as provide for her in her time of need. This means that a Muslim man cannot demand that his Muslim wife to give up her job, so that she can spend more time with him and be with him exclusively. Further, a Muslim man cannot insist on the wife converting to Islam, for this would be considered a violation of the right of the woman to ‘follow her own path.’ In short, a Muslim man cannot force his woman to be what she does not want to be, or demand that she change her religion, or marry him.
However, in some countries in the Middle East such as Morocco, there are certain regions that do allow Muslim sex. In some towns in Morocco for example, a marriage arranged in the traditional manner, with the involvement of a guardian, is allowed to include certain aspects of Muslim sex. Although marriage without the approval of the customary law is considered to be valid in the eyes of the law, the Muslim marriage is still considered to take place in a religiously acceptable manner. This means that married women can have pre-marital sex with their partners, as long as it is not seen as something which goes against the modesty of their religion.
Not all Muslims consider pre-marital sex to be forbidden. A small minority, known as the hijab brigade, would argue that Muslim sex should be allowed as long as it is not forced upon the women. The concept of ‘moderation’ is often used to explain the view that Muslim women should have the freedom to choose whether or not they have pre-marital sex. However, some scholars argue that there is no way of defining ‘moderation’ because it is irrelevant. While some argue that it might allow pre-marital sex under certain conditions, there is no universal agreement on this matter.
There are other issues that face Muslim women today. Many are faced with traditional gender roles, which mean that a woman must always be a ‘housewife,’ even if she is also a ‘custodial mother.’ Because of these strict rules, many young girls are left alone and are unable to pursue an education or gain employment. For these girls, being married early is often the only option.
If a Muslim woman is not allowed to have pre-marital sex, how then can she be expected to pursue a career? Many educated women have had to abandon their families in order to work long hours and bring in a steady income. Without a degree, they are denied access to higher education and career advancement. This is leading to a situation where many educated married women are taking advantage of their ignorance and marrying men outside their culture. Once they get married, they cannot change their minds and return to living a life of Islamic principles. This leaves them with few options.
The answer lies in finding a way for Muslim women to have pre-marital sex, while respecting their rights to remain within the home and raise their children. Fortunately, this is possible. There are Muslim online dating sites where Muslim married women can find their lifetime partners. These sites cater to Muslim women seeking to start a new family and are also beneficial for those who have been previously married and wish to re-enter the marital bed. The concept of Muslim matrimonial rites has changed little over the centuries. Muslim cultures are very conservative and adhering to the Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) carries certain obligations.